Part 1 Undoing the Way We See Things Now
I am not a body. I am free. For I am still as God created me.
- (193) All things are lessons God would have me learn.
A lesson is a miracle which God offers to me, in place of thoughts I made that hurt me. What I learn of Him becomes the way I am set free. And so I choose to learn His lessons and forget my own.
I am not a body. I am free.
For I am still as God created me.
It is with great thankfulness that today’s idea is absorbed into my being. I have felt adrift. Death in the family, travel, sleeping in yet another bed, the joy of family, the adjustment to their personalities, egos, opinions, and belief systems, the stories from the past, the sorting through the estate – by the time we got back home we were exhausted.
Instead of devotions, journal writing, and blogging at night, I chose instead – these past few days – to watch a few episodes of “my show” before going to sleep at night. While the brothers reminisced and made plans for the remaining estate, I called bedtime and watched Mad Men on my Netflix app.
I don’t know how to read the story of my own life, to make sense of it, without the Holy Spirit’s guidance. This morning’s message to me was this – to catch up on the lessons that I missed, in my personal lesson journal and on the website. Holy Spirit told me not to cheat myself from this by watching ego-based shows. I know all I need to know about the ego, Holy Spirit informed me. The ego has nothing to teach me, but Holy Spirit has much to remind me of – and I am to go with that. I was so thankful for this reminder, for this guidance. I had a heavy heart about my lapses and my lack of discipline in this regard, and yet today’s lesson review was that all things are lessons God would have me learn. Even my lapses are lessons. My lapses into choosing pain instead of joy and love and peace.
Why listen to those old stories? They do nothing except inform me once again of reasons to either forgive and thereby fill my mind with love, peace, and joy or hold grudges and suffer pain, sorrow, grief, resentment, and fear. Today I choose forgiveness, again. I choose joy and love and peace, again. Into the holy instant I meet my father-in-law. Forgiven. Innocent of any wrongdoing. Eternally blessed. Even as I am forgiven, innocent, and eternally blessed. He is free and I am free, and we are free. I choose to learn the lessons of God and forget my own. If unforgiving thoughts tempt me to pick up the old grudges, I will again choose forgiveness and enter the holy instant with our dear earthly father.
Today I ask the love of God to fill my mind and give no room to any thoughts of ill will or unforgiveness toward the grievances of the past. I ask to learn the technique of living in the blessed moment, in the present and not the past. I ask for illumination as our study group meets to study the Course today, as we share our insights, and our personal applications. All lessons, mine, yours, everybody’s, are lessons God would have us learn. Teach us, Teacher, is my prayer.