PART II. SECTION 4: WHAT IS SIN?
Lesson 253 My Self is Ruler of the Universe
- It is impossible that anything should come to me unbidden by myself. Even in this world, it is I who rule my destiny. What happens is what I desire. What does not occur is what I do not want to happen. This must I accept. For thus am I led past this world to my creations, children of my will, in Heaven where my holy Self abides with them, and Him Who has created me.
- You are the Self Whom You created Son, creating like Yourself and one with You. My Self, Which rules the universe, is but Your Will in perfect union with my own, which can but offer glad assent to Yours, that it may be extended to Itself.
Lately, the message of the Course lessons is one of total responsibility. It has been made apparent in my own life, through object lessons, highly personalized and relevant, that I am not a victim of anybody or anything. That everything that has happened and continues to happen in this world – I chose, I invited it. I bade it come.
This is a hard lesson. I am accustomed to thinking of others as having wronged me, especially when I was young and seemingly powerless. To take responsibility for my childhood – of losing my father at such a young age, of going on those chaotic, nerve-wracking missionary trips with my mother; of sharing our home with bizarre and dangerous people; and the struggle to find a shred of truth, friendship, security, and love in all that muddle is challenging to accept. How could I have possibly invited that and why?
Last week, I started watching Stranger Things on Netflix. I have tried to watch the show before, but the overacting of one particular character was such a turnoff to me I lost immediate interest. However, after several promptings by my grandsons, son, and friends, I decided to give it another go. In the fifth chapter of season one, young Nancy encounters the hollow tree. She hears the growling and rustling inside. She spots the long tendrils of sticky stuff dangling down, but instead of running away, she walks toward the tree. “Nobody would do that,” my mind shouted to the writers in protest. Nancy puts her hand in the gaping hole; she brushes aside the green mucus; she puts her head in and looks around; she steps inside, and enters an underworld of terrifying gloom. “Oh, I can’t watch this,” I say to myself. “It is just ridiculous. Nobody would be so stupid!”
Oh yes, Holy Spirit said to me, and gently brought to mind a particular relationship that I had been in several years ago. All the signs were screaming: “Run, little girl, run!” But little girl didn’t run. She walked right into it with her eyes wide open, knowing she was in dangerous territory, knowing that it wasn’t love, knowing that it would end in disaster. So no, the writers of Stranger Things know how danger enthralls us, calls to us, excites us, and entices us in. It was me that has blindly lived my life griping about how mean and terrible it can be, not realizing how very much I enjoyed the drama, discord, disaster, and death. And yet how dull, repetitive, and stupid all that gets after several rounds!
I asked for this, every single event in this ego life – the body, the world, the circumstances that befuddled at best and broke my heart at worst. I asked for this when I asked for the separation. I am a Son of God. It is I who rule my destiny – it is not the government, my parents, my brothers and sisters, my husband and children, my friends and enemies, my job and workmates. It is not my ancestry, society, political party. It is me.
When we accept this, and accept it we must, we are led past this world to our real creation and creations to rule in Heaven where our Holy Self abides with God, Creator of all.
In describing the Course yesterday to my friend Jamie, I called the curriculum an esoteric, psychological, and philosophical approach to Christianity which is bringing me to a deeper love for and understanding of Jesus. And this lesson fits the esoteric depiction; it is a mystery to me. Though I do not know what Jesus means when He says, “my creations, children of my will,” I am willing to let this be a mystery beyond my ability to comprehend at this time. It will not confound me because I have learned lesson by lesson to trust in the wisdom and guidance and eventual illumination which Holy Spirit provides.
The beautiful prayer in verse two is one of joyful recognition where in our seeking to know God, we realize that He is the Self who created the Son, not to grovel and be an underling, but to be like Him and one with Him. The ego would make underlings, creatures to kneel and worship and sacrifice, suffering all kinds of hardship with puny “rewards” to keep the adulation coming. Certain world leaders come to mind – those who command adoration and adornment while the citizens starve and go without. This is not our God! Our God made us like Himself, to be one with Him and to rule the universe with Him in perfect union when we give our happy assent to His Will.
What a loving and wonderful concept of our Creator! Lord of a friendly, orderly, benevolent, never-ending universe – and there my holy Self rules with Him in happy communion.